Some Introspective


Hello everyone and welcome to the weekend. Coffee is brewing and I believe I am rested up. Last night I had my doubts because I was so tired that I had a really hard time falling asleep. Finally though I did and arose with coffee on the mind, showered, dressed and here I am. With my surgery coming up in about a week, I have some thinking to do and thought I would share it with you all. So for today, some introspective on yours truly….

Do you ever ask yourselves, “Is it really just me”? As those of you that truly know me, I can be like an acquired taste. Not for everyone but those that love me, REALLY love me. Everyone else just kind of crinkles their nose and walks by. Part of the reason for that is three fold…

  1. After years of holding back, I typically say what is on my mind.
  2. The message I feel I have goes against the modern Church.
  3. Β I expect the best out of people, including their motives.

Typically these are the three reasons people seem to gravitate away from me; with my time getting short before my surgery though, my thoughts have turned to maybe I shouldn’t be this way. Maybe I should suppress my thoughts no matter the consequences; maybe I should just fall in line with the modern Church, go my Sunday’s and Wednesdays and shut up; and finally expect the worst from people and not help hold them and myself to a higher standard…

Now I say all of this with an honest motive, I don’t know if anyone can relate but it just gets tiring being the one almost everyone wants to avoid. My bride is the one exception, she is ALWAYS there for me, no matter what. She may offer a countermeasure or two to what I am feeling or saying but nevertheless she is always there and I am grateful for her beyond measure. However, I can’t even get people in my family and friend circle to read this blog; again I am grateful for those that do, but it gets frustrating you know? So it makes me wonder, is it all worth it? Is being this person that God has created more of a hindrance than help? I always thought in this world of evil, those three qualities above would go a long way in helping, now not so much…

In this world of 24 hours news and 24 hour social engagement, I hardly ever hear from my family and friends. Its almost like they feel like I’m a plague they want to avoid. It may not be true but when you see posts on Facebook but can’t get people to return a simple text, make you think hmmmm, maybe its me. Maybe it is and it shouldn’t matter? I mean again Jesus had twelve disciples, one of which betrayed Him, one always doubted Him, and one that completely denied Him at the most crucial points; so should I expect more than Jesus had? Probably not, but I’m definitely not Jesus either….Seems like those that fall in line with the world just have more fun and are more liked/loved. Does that even matter? I’m confused this morning, what say all of you? Can you relate?

Hope to hear from some of you soon…

Peace, Love, and Truth,


8 thoughts on “Some Introspective

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  1. Sometimes it is hard to know when to talk or when to be quiet and let God handle things. I know I like to think I am “helping” out but in reality, I am just interfering in His plan. I think you know what I am referring to. Sometimes (ok most of the time,) we let our emotions get the best of us too. You mean well and your heart is in the right place, David. Anyone who knows you will agree to that. Praying for you and your upcoming surgery.


  2. I cannot completely, but yes somewhat can relate to you.And no you are not an exception, it’s just that people today can’t accept someone who actually thinks. they want to see themselves, their mirror image in others so that they can feel good about themselves, and when they find someone who differs they just can’t handle it because that person starts reflecting their faults. You are a good person, and if these are the 3 characteristics that actually define you, then just keep on going and be as you are, just do one thing Stop expecting and just live for yourself. And good luck for your surgery.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. All we can do is plant seeds and allow Him to water and harvest. It seems in this day & age and all modern technology, families are driven farther apart. Visits, phone calls seem to be a part of the past. We just need to keep following Him and doing our best. We need to surround ourselves with other believers and encourage them as them encourage us. None of us are perfect, but He is still working on me and for that I am so thankful. Love you my brother and praying for your surgery.

    Liked by 1 person

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